Dear Grammer Genious,
Thank you for your much needed Blog. It's about time we had a place to ask our grammer questions. I'm going to ask my Henlopen Acres neighbor Joanne to tell her worshipful, clinging nephew Matt Drudge to slashdot you.
Here's my question. One of the aisle markers in our grocery store says "Can Vegetables" and another says "Bottle Water." Our new Russian stockboy Akim says it should say "Canned Vegetables" and "Bottled Water." Is he right? I mean, their in cans, so why not "Can Vegetables"? He's getting fired in October anyway, so I don't really care if he's right or not.
Signed, Goober
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Dear Goob (may I call you Goob?),
Tell me, do you say "iced cream", and "iced tea"? Do you say "skimmed milk", "caked mix", and "jacked cheese"? Of course you don't! So then, "can vegetables" is not only logical, but it's the only proper way to say it. Besides, what would some Russian kid know about it? Russians can't even say "the" in their own language!
Also, it's none of my business, but since he has such a tenous graps of English, why are you waiting until October? Also, "Akim" sounds like an Arabic name to me.
The Grammer Genious
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